"A professional headshot in front of a bookshelf says you're an intellectual. A professional headshot peeking though a bookshelf says you're probably under a restraining order."
- Ryan Lilly
"The world’s most lethal venom is not found on the tongues of serpents, but on the tongues of a disgruntled wife."
- Matshona Dhliwayo
"An inch to a man’s heart is a mile to his wallet."
"Get high on love, not drugs."
"Be calm when your wife yells at you, calmer when she chastens you, but be terrified when she ignores you."
"Your wife is smarter than you; know this, and you will live happily ever after."
"Falling in love with someone is intentional, even if it was their looks that tripped you."
"There is nothing wrong with being a puppet if love is the one pulling the strings."
"The easiest way to remember your future wife’s birthday is to marry her on Super Bowl Sunday."
"If men could be bought like clothes at an outlet, only then would women always get what they bargained for."