"Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty."
- Carl Hiaasen
"Hey. Sometimes life is a shit flavored Popsicle."
"I’m waiting for the day when Rush Limbaugh’s pharmacist writes a book."
"Dessert was an over baked chocolate chip cookies the size of a hockey puck and just about as tasty."
"as a lobbyist he had long ago concluded there was no difference in how Democrats and Republicans conducted the business of government. The game stayed the same: It was always about favors and friends,..."
"Please don't grow up to be one of those men who lie for the sport of it, and most men do. That's a fact. That's why the world is so messed up, Noah. That's why history books are full of so much hearta..."
"From the bow of the canoe she asked, "Do you know a rain dance?""First I need a virgin."
"...Right now there's a pair of bad cops on their way out here to shoot me.""You don't know that.""Yeah, you're right," Stranahan said. "They're probably just collecting Toys for Tots. Now go."
"Remember what happened last time with the 'cuda."
"Sunset on the water ought to be a quiet and easy time, but I guess some people can't stand a little silence."