"I find it rude to laugh at a man with a sword."
- Derek Landy
"But I'm really enjoying my retirement. I get to sleep in every day. I do crossword puzzles and eat cake."
"I mean you ACRES of harm,' Dalrymple growled. 'Untold QUANTITIES of harm. I will visit a whole CONTINENT of harm upon you before we are through."
"I'm going to photograph every single person to enter and leave this tattoo parlour." Finbar rolled his eyes. "And they'll hate that, because people who get dragons drawn on their backs are normally so..."
"He'd once known a man who said that life hinged on the moment, that everything changed in the blink of an eye. Tesseract knew the truth of that as well as anybody. It was in those moments that he stru..."
"I wasn't always who I am now. No one ever is. I've spent my entire lifetime becoming who I am. Finally, I'm here and I'm old. It's depressing, it really is."
"The lies we tell other people are nothing to the lies we tell ourselves."
"I understand perfectly. Darquesse isn't a separate entity. She isn't another person. She's you. If you make the wrong choices, if you stop loving the people who love you, if you allow the world to twi..."
"I love stories with a happy ending,” Inspector Me said."
"A living skeleton isn't enough for you, is it? What does it take to impress young people these days?"