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"Did you read the part that says, 'Your hair is like a flock of goats'? How romantic is that? Or that other line, 'Your neck is like the tower of David.' Oh, now, that sounds real attractive! If some g..."

"Is there some kind of rule for when Sam should be a boy and when he's a Wolf?""A Wolf lifts his leg and yellows up the snow. A boy has to use the toilet.""And that will work?""Only if he needs to pee."

"Boys are stupid, throw rocks at them."

"I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s. I wouldn’t trade the small thin-lipped mouth that makes me resemble my nephew. I wouldn’t even trade the acne scar on my right cheek, becaus..."

"Who knows, he may grow up to be President someday, unless they hang him first!" Aunt Polly about Tom Sawyer"

"The thought of Peter and John Ambrose McClaren in the same space together again is discomforting. Where would I even look?"

"He told me once that he didn't fear conscription as much as everyone else because the dozen bloodthirsty girls he was leaving behind were far more dangerous."

"He hadn’t said a word to me until we had been roommates for eight months. And even then it had only been, “You’re wearing my socks."

"Only a very careless father would be inclined to tell you what I'm going to tell you. I suppose I'm about to act like the disreputable uncle who everyone fears to leave the boys with because he encour..."

"I was told very sternly at the hospital to avoid boys at all costs. Mess up your levels.""Oh, they do that!" Amy laughs. "Probably best to leave them alone for a while. The secret, though, is to start..."