"Her idea of a romantic setting is one that has a diamond in it. If you feel the need to marry a doctor I suggest a dermatologist. Good hours free Retin-A."
- Rita Rudner
"Men like cars women like clothes. Women only like cars because they take them to clothes."
"Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man."
"Men who drink herbal teas are seldom serial killers."
"If you like easygoing monogamous men stay away from billionaires."
"Most men are secretly still mad at their mothers for throwing away their comic books. They would be valuable now."
"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult."
"Men in high levels of government seldom surf."
"Most of the men sitting in first class on an airplane have really boring jobs."
"All men look at Dr. Ruth and wonder how she has gained all that sexual experience."